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7 Things I learned When I Had My Last Baby

Posted by Rachel R. Vanderveen on Monday, January 20th, 2014 at 10:51am.



  1.  When you walk in to a delivery room after as many pregnancies as I’ve had, you get a bit of street cred. I learned that I finally have a respected voice in my own delivery room. Not that I didn’t before; it’s just that before it was harder to have the staff listen.
  2. Midwives, support all birth choices except mine: to have an epidural. It’s all freedom of choice, individuality, and power to the mammas until you say you’d like a needle in your spine. If I’m wrong, please someone give me the name of a midwife who will let me have my plan, my way. I’ve already spoken to several, who will not…and they actually tried to shame me a little for my choice. I’d love, love, love to have a midwife next time who supports my birth plan.
  3. For me and my family, vaccinations need to be delayed. We gave it on time for the first time to this baby, and it changed her to a totally different child within a matter of hours. I delayed all of my other babies, I don’t know why I changed a good thing with this one. For now on, I’m going to put a two - four month lag on shots.
  4. I need to tell all of my friends and family that I do not need support in my post partum time. I could do post partum with my eyes closed. It’s easy peasy. When I need support is in my last four weeks of pregnancy, which for me is weeks 38-42. It is 10 kinds of unbearable for me. I’m in so much pain I can barely move. Every single time, I know it’s likely I’ll go overdue again, but every single time, I hold out hope that baby will come sometime around his or her due date. It’s mental torture. I’ve also made a note to try to remember to reach out to other mammas during this time. I want to try to get that early support in to them before their friends and family swoop in after baby is born.
  5. Post Partum Depression/Baby Blues can be avoided by deep-nesting. (This is just for me. I don’t know if it works for everyone). If I stay at home with my babe in my arms for the majority of my day for the first two-four weeks, the baby blues stay at bay. When I leave my house or leave my babe somewhere with someone else, baby blues creep in. Deep-nesting worked fabulous for me.
  6. I’m not offering a number to people anymore about how many kids I have. If they ask, I’ll tell them, but I’m not throwing it out there anymore. Once you get to this many kids, many people are strangely not happy/excited for you anymore when you get pregnant. I actually had a lady at Costco lecture me about over-population.
  7. Even after all these kids, there is always so much more to learn. Every time I think I have it all figured out, my kids grow and/or change and parenting is a whole new ball game again, but it’s the best game there is. I love every minute. Clint and I have no regrets, and we’re thankful every day that we’ve been blessed with so many little hearts to love and raise.

Rachel Vanderveen

The Vanderveen Team
Maxwell South Star Realty
Phone: 403.253.5678 Fax: 403.592.6736

1 Response to "7 Things I learned When I Had My Last Baby"

Laurir wrote: I have to say I am disappointed that you had unsupportive midwives. My experience was the complete opposite. My midwives encouraged my own birth plans, some included epidurals some didn't. They were AWESOME! My midwife was also a Christian and was able to share the experience with me as an act of praise. She also prayed with me during my prenatal care appointments, labour, delivery and postpartum during difficulty with anxiety. She was awesome! So if you ever want to return to the GTA to birth your babies, I'll connect you to her! :-)

Posted on Monday, January 20th, 2014 at 4:08pm.

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